Sadness

I couldn't think of another title. Actually, I could think of another S word but didn't want to use it. For those wondering which leg is hurt it is the left one. Thank God!! I have an automatic transmission vehicle so I can drive except the pain pill bottle says I shouldn't. Co-workers have been very nice to offer to taxi me so I'm going that route for the next week or so.

You know, just when I get in a pit and ready to throw myself a pity party, someone comes along that is in worse shape than I am. That is how last night and today have gone. I don't mean to dump this stuff on you but it is either post/dump it or eat so there you go.

I received an email from my sister in another city that another sister's daughter in law miscarried yesterday. What a bummer? My nephew and his wife married later in life and had a baby 10 months ago but want another child and wanted to have them close in age. Personally I think they are nuts for wanting to do that but nevertheless, I'm not the one having them or raising them. We all rejoiced over the 1st baby, a boy. We rejoiced over the 2nd baby to be announcement and now we are heartsick over what they are going through. I guess I thought this news was the final straw for me or maybe it was the pain pills but I cried and cried and cried as if I couldn't stop. This morning I looked like "who would have thought it". I drug my sleepy, swollen eyed self out of the bed and proceeded to pull the trash bag over my cast, secure it, shower, get ready for work but I was late and I just didn't care. I think if my boss had said one word or looked sideways at me I would have just lost it. However, she was out of town and the only co-workers that paid any attention to me were supportive ones.

A friend called and wanted to have lunch, she sounded down and said she needed to talk. I explained my leg/cast and driving ordeal and told her I just didn't feel like going to a restaurant but if she wanted to pick something up we could eat in our conference room. I knew with the boss gone no one would be using it. I didn't think she would go for that idea but she did. She brought us both really great taco salads (with chicken fajita meat). I did not eat the shell. We caught up a little bit. I asked about her family and OMG I could have ripped my own tongue out. The look on her face I can't even describe, then the tears started to flow. She is getting a divorce from her husband of 38 years. Do I even need to go into the details? You can probably figure those out for yourself.

Now I'm single and if I ever get the urge for companionship, I remember my friends and family members divorces. UGH!!

By the time the day was over and I got home I was/am exhausted and wanted to eat everything in the kitchen. Luckily, there is nothing in the kitchen that isn't healthy and I didn't have the energy to go out and get binge/fast food.

WHEW!!! I feel such a release just now.

I suppose journaling does work. I don't have all this bottled up inside me now.

I have a tendency to fret about things I can't to anything about. Of course, no one is wanting or expecting me to do anything for them not my nephew or his wife and not my friend. My friend just needed to know I care about her and will be there to listen. I sent my nephew and his wife a thinking of you through this difficult time card. I don't think I would want to be talking to a lot of people, if I were her. I'll call my sister this weekend after she settles down some. Since she didn't call me directly, she must be handling it as best as she can.

Thanks blog buddies for hanging in here with me.